Monday, April 19, 2010
i'm so tired of pretending. everything is ok. but actually it wasn't. my tears is starting to show and my smile is fading away. i put my heart into all that i wanted with u and u showed me time and time again that i'm not worth the sacrifice. well u won't really miss me until i'm gone. so much pain. i don't want this feeling. my scars are deep and cannot be healed. i'm forever wounded. forever in pain. i can't recover. i am too hurt. why would u cause me this? how could u do this to me? what are u doing to me? what did i ever do to u? the only thing i've ever done is love u. so it's just best if i keep it to myself before i lose too much. but the mostly is i hate that i don't hate u. well someday all will make perfect sense. so for now, i will laugh at the confusion. i will smile through the tears. and keep reminding myself that everything happens for a reason.