well this may hurting. sorry for that. how am i going to start this? erm.. im in a big problem now. being in matrix was really hard for me. in the first place im doing this for my future. the thing is.. now my mum at my nenek's house. nenek yang urus mama sekarang because dah tak ada maid. now can u imagine that? sepatutnya i yang jaga my mum. but i just can't do that because im here at matrix doing my study. what kind of daughter am i? selfish?! ungrateful?! maybe im the next si tanggang.. i feel like dying when thinking all this. somehow i think i need to back off from my plan. yela kalau mama boleh berkorban nyawa lahirkan i. then siap susah payah besarkan i lagi. tak salah if i berkorban pulak. tapi how bout my dad? i know ayah sangat berharap i dapat segulung ijazah tu. tapi..ntahla. semuanya masih dalam pertimbangan. hope i can solve this problem asap.
Ya Allah... berilah petunjukmu...
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